Also: Assletic, Assleticism.
Tom: (wearing basket-ball jersey) Hey Jake! I never knew you liked basket-ball aswell. You want to shoot some hoops sometime?
Dan: Naw, man. You'd kick my ass. I'm more of an asslete.
Tom: Oh, true. Maybe we could play some videogames then.
Dan: That's more up my alley.
You think he's bad? How about Randy Moss not getting charged for trying to run down a traffic cop? Now THERE's an asslete!