Democrat: Actually, statistically, the rich recieved almost-
Republican: Your numbers mean nothing.
Democrat: This entire issue is about numbers!
Republican: No, this is about the people! This is about Joe Everyman!
Democrat: What the hell are you talking about?
Republican: I'm talking about how you radicals use numbers to mislead everyone into thinking the Bush tax cuts were bad, and that we have massive debt.
Democrat: ...We DO have massive debt, and the average person got around $300 back, whereas the rich got-
Republican: Are you telling these people America is BAD? Are you saying that America isn't the best damn country ever?
Democrat: No, I just-wait, what? This isn't about me! This is about the issues!
Republican: Not responding to my questions. Typical.
Republican: See, clearly I have silenced you with my powerful, factual argument.
Democrat: I had sex with your wife, Bill.
Democrat: She said she wanted a man who didn't tell her she belonged in the kitchen.
2. Tend to believe that government should come to the aid the most disadvantaged in society (see Unemployment Insurance, Temporary Assistance for Needy Families, Medicare, Medicaid, Social Security). We don't bring it up much, but it's what Jesus taught.
3. Belive in the separation of church and state, on the off-chance that not everyone in America is a Southern Baptist.
4. Doesn't believe that industries have the unfettered right to dump carcinogens into our water supplies. Also believe in protecting public health and worker safety.
5. Believe in strengthening public education, rather than gutting it with vouchers.
6. Belive in civil liberties and equal rights for all people, regardless of gender, race, or sexual orientation; a Democratic President pushed through the Civil Rights Act even though it meant losing half of his party. That half, comprising mostly of racist whites, now overwhelmingly votes Republican.
7. Most have actually read the 9th amendment. Can also spell "amendment."
8. Represent broadest spectrum of the American public: women, blacks, Latinos, gays, Jews, seculars, immigrants, union workers, and yes, also straight middle-class white male Protestants like me.
Despite a wealth of good ideas, Democrats have allowed themselves to be intimdated by semi-literate meatheads called Republicans
2) Someone who believes that Saddam Hussein had more of a right to live than an unborn baby.
3) Someone who does not personally give money to the disadvantaged, but forces other people to do so.
4) Someone who defended Bill Clinton when he attacked Iraq in 1998, but criticized George W. Bush for doing the same thing in 2003.
5) In the United States, someone who has never heard of the Constitution.
In general, the democrats are considered more liberal/left wing and the republicans more conservative/right wing. Although this is correct on average, individual differences in general are larger than party differences and thus individual democrats can easily end up on the right of individual republicans.
Usually takes strong opposition to George W. Bush, including constant mockery and many political cartoons satarizing him.
More recently, decries any political joke or cartoon at President Obama's expense as racist and unfair.
"But sir, you have gone on record as being strongly for abortion."
"I don't see any connection."
"You're against sentencing someone who made a choice to commit his crimes to death, but are willing to kill a human fetus."
"Ah, well that's not a human."
"But it's a beating heart of something that will inarguably become human. And many would take the stand that it IS a human."
"Look at that! We're out of time!"