The magical major where you have to write a program the night before it is due while your friends are playing poker and getting laid.
Forces you to take 3 semesters of calculus. This is not good.
1) Hardcore computer people who want power Power POWER!
2) Masochistic individual who enjoys punishing himself
3) One who wants to become a programmer
Don't confuse a CS msjor for one who majors in Information Systems, or "Lazy Man's CS". Information Systems is more similar to majoring in Word.
Computer science has its roots primarily in the fields of electrical engineering (i.e., electronics), mathematics and linguistics. It is still a relatively young field, mainly because it was only about a half century ago that electronics technology became sufficiently advanced to allow the construction of even primitive electronic computing devices.
A) ruin your GPA...
B) make you hate your computer...
C) make your eyes bleed from reading too much code...
D) make you hate math and all things related to it...
F) not teach you how to make cool video games...
G) not teach you how to make neat animations...
H) teach you equations that hurt your head...
I) make you want to become a more violent person...
J) will make you gain weight from lack of movement...
K) ruin any chance of a college social life...
L) may be a cause of long term depression...
M) may make you suicidal!
Johnnie: "He's right over there!"
Josie: "That fat pale guy with glasses? JESUS! THAT'S TERRIBLE! What happened to him?"
Johnny: "Yeah... Remember freshman year he decided to study Computer Science"
Josie: "OMG I would want to die!"
Johnnie: "Yeah... I think he might want to as well!"
Common symptoms of torture from computer science are:
1. Hating computers and everything related to them.
2. Pulling your hair our after trying to understand error messages.
3. Extreme anger as a result of the computer being an asshole that takes everything literally.
4. Loss of motivation/apathy towards work
John: "Hey Bill, I thought you majored in computer science. Why are you working at McDonalds? You could be making a lot of money doing that shit."
Bill: "Well, I did get offered a job in a firm that pays 250k a year but I decided I would rather kill myself and cut off my testicles before I actually work with computers again. Fuck computers and fuck computer science."
Henry looked back at his choice to become a cs major with anguish. Ever since he declared cs a major, he has gained 200 pounds in the past 4 years, is completely pale and still has acne at age 22. Also, hes a virgin. This is the result of having to spend nearly 10 hours a day writing useless programs and trying to understand computer code. While his college friends were out getting laid, getting drunk, smoking weed, partying and doing a shit ton of awesome drugs, Henry was stuck in front of his computer trying to figure out why his program won't compile.
Gail stares intently at his computer screen. "I almost got it," he mutters to himself. "There it is! Eureka!" Now I can finally work on something else.
What we have hear is Gail mulling over a problem in one of his programs. But, what you don't know is that Gail has been working on the same 4 lines of code for 78 hours as a result of some fucktarded error message that he kept receiving.
"I can't wait to go to my Java class today!! It's filled with nothing but hot girls!" -said no one ever