A UNIX clone written by Linus Torvalds so people can have a UNIX-like OS which has no AT&T code for which you need to pay royalties. Known sometimes as GNU/Linux. Morons complain about compiling their software when the reason is for the software to be cross-compatible.
The city council demands that you disect one of them and allow the town citizens to do whatever they want to it.
The town citizens use genetic modification to enhance choice organs.
They take several days to re-animate the cow, until they finally have a working zombie-cow that produces SuperMilk (similar to Popeye's spinach) but random organs stop every 10 seconds, forcing the people to disect it again just to fix it.
You live happily on your regular milk while the town struggles.
I'm just as astounded as you.
Windows user: "...the hell?"
Not as good as people make it out to be, very undeveloped and bad compatibility weights this OS down.
The reason that Linux does not have as many viruses, trojans, spyware, etc as your precious "Windoze" is because it is not incompatible with these programs - Linux is not popular enough... yet.
"Linux-text-only" was a long time ago noobs, get with the times please.
I bet they buy an APC magazine with a live-CD and call Linux slow because they don't even understand how RAM swap files work.
I myself prefer UNIX without any kind of GUI.
Linux runs the web (80% of all servers).
Linux is the base-station of most hackers (see 'Hackers Handbook' by Dr. K, ISBN 1-85868-943-0) because it is inherently secure.
'Yeah dude you fux0red up that poor dudes windoze box'
'Yeah man, linux r0x0rz!!!'
*cue beavis and butthead style laughter*