2.disgustin gold people from northern states who wear speedos on our beaches. God help us all.
You can spot a snowbird by it’s white or graying hair color (or sometimes light blue or orange form a dye job gone bad), it’s pastel colored clothes, use of sweaters, socks in sandals or white tennis shoes, dark colored over sized sun glasses, and of course it’s irritating Yankee accent. They tend to drive over sized gas guzzling cars such as Lincolns and Cadillac’s because they are retired and have the money to spend.
Typically known to drive well under the normal speed in traffic, (about 35 MPH below and in the passing lane) and prone to rubbernecking therefore making places such as Florida the traffic accident capital of the US. Other than making driving conditions terrible for Native Floridians and other Southerners, snowbirds also infest restaurants, post offices, stores, doctor’s office’s by the droves making it next to impossible to get it during the winter months. They in turn complain about how crowed it is and how they have to wait in line.
Even though tourist traps love snowbirds because of the revenue they bring, most people who are native to the states the snowbirds visit hate them with a passion and wish they’d go home.
perosn 2: we can't, it's fucking snowbird season!
person 1: let's go crash their million dollar cars so maybe they will leave!
person 2: great idea!
person 1: yeah, snowbirds suck ass!
An elderly person who drives 1x10^25 too slow, and drives a huge, polluting SUV covered in war veteran stickers. And when they drive, their heads tend to disappear.
Someone who complains about the locals just because their lives are now obsolete and meaningless.
Someone who donates unfathomable amounts of money to funds that don't really need it (btw...thx).
While the locals will tell the snowbirds that they are welcome, the are truly nothing more than intruders and interlopers in our fair desert home. They make up for 1/2 of the traffic during their season, yet they find every loophole to keep their vehicles registered out of state, thus forcing the locals to pay for all the damage that they cause to the road. They carry an arrogant attitude that says "I'm spending my money here, treat me like royalty."
Snowbirds would be considered little more than a harmless nuisance if it were not for the fact that they are allowed to drive here in Arizona. Local drivers here in Arizona (the ones with Arizona Tags) are scientifically proven to be the most hopelessly stupid people ever to sit behind a steering wheel. Unfortunately, add lost drivers with slowing revlexes, poor vision, and vehicles the size of small apartments and there is little reason as to why car insurance is so high out here.
Spotting Tips: Look for cheap diner-style resturaunts such as Villiage Inn or Denny's which serve food that can be afforded on a so called "fixed income" (whatever that is). The snowbirds can typically be spotted here. When approaching these parking lots, give the snowbirds a wide berth, as they will often perform a fifty-two point turn to get into their space. Their average time (this has been clocked) in successfully backing out of a space is typically four minutes and twenty three seconds, so if you are in a hurry, steer clear.
2. The snowbird paid for his $14 pizza delivery with unrolled change and did not tip the driver.
3. The snowbird did not see the light turn green, and sat still for the entirety of the light, despite the mile-long line of cars honking at her.